I got chris browned last night
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
