i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize