Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
