I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
