HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
