okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
did i walk over a car last night?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
