"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
