loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I see more hoeing in ur future
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