I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
