I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
