Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
