I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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