fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
