your thong is hanging out like whoa
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I touched a dick in church today
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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