I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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