1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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