and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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