How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
