Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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