I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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