There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
