i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
