Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
