Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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