Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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