This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
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