If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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