I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You took a bar mat shot.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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