It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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