It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize