I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
