I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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