The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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