Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Still dying that you shit outside
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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