I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
