so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
