dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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