He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize