I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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