how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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