spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Houston, we have a squirter
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
