So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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