Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
