My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
