I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
