Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
