the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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