Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
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