Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
where does the pee come out of this thing
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
