this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
