Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize